Autism awareness part 8: Will not recognise the sun if there is no shadow

Will not recognise the sun if there is no shadow

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PURE

Repetitive body movements

Repetitive body movements

Repetitive body movements

Repetitive body movements

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5:30 When everything is so pure. Have you ever felt that bliss point when you accept the conditions as they are. No wrongs only you. No expectations, no regrets. Those peaceful morning moments full of pure love. Like your extra time before the “real time counting” starts. Today I see everything so clear. The good I accept. The bad I accept. The moment when the ego doesn’t exist. Just we in our pure energy. Soaked in the most important thing- to live a life that we ourselves accept and in which we feel peaceful.

 

RATHER THE RAIN ON THE WINDOW OF THE CASTLE THAN THE CASTLE ITSELF, RATHER THE FLIGHT OF THE BIRD, RATHER BURNT THAN CAPTURED.

There are givers and there are takers and it’s like our world, our society teaching us that being a giver(which means being a provider of emotions, work, help) usuals being a loser(because nobody does nothing without any reward or outcome anymore). I rarely see pure intentions out of a pure heart. I see people believing in “taking” without giving. Taking without appreciating. But my honest believe is that without “giving” we enter a vicious  circle of non gratitude and the non gratitude is the root of suffering in a long term according to me.

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While I was volunteering at Karen’s home where they take care of kids suffering from autism, almost every day a parent was coming to me, sharing some regrets. Maybe searching for “someone who would listen and understand the pain”.

Many parents and patient associations were often concerned about the highly mediatised coverage of a possible link between autism and the measles, mumps and rubella (vaccine). However, there is no evidence from current studies that support this relationship. And my personal opinion is that vaccines did so good to our society that we can`t possibly measure and imagine.

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Many of them used to come to me and I could feel their pain – they were often sharing regret, telling me they were smoking or doing drugs/alcohol abuse while pregnancy. They believed “they could have done it differently… better…”

After hearing all of their stories, full with negative emotions about the past, regretting their actions – I remember very clearly I was feeling drained. I remember how I was crying almost every night. I was crying about all the women and men, about their kids, about their regrets. And mostly I was feeling so emotional about all these people “being HAUNTED in that regret”

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I wish more people would read this article and understand that «regret» is not a way of living. Being haunted in negativity is not a way of living.

I truly wish I could give you some hope within my words. I cannot «toss» the past, I cannot «erase» anything, neither can you, right ? But we should learn one simple thing. To live our emotions and to be open about the way we feel. I know it’s becoming quite normal to be ashamed of our feelings and to think and feel they are not right and we deserve “not to have it all”. That we are going to be ridiculous if we “expose” our true beliefs and nature.

But the truth to me is that the only «way out of living in regret» is to accept and embrace it. To make negative emotions live in your body, to feel them at it’s maximum – NO SHAME!, and then let them LEAVE.

Bad things happen, nobody is really protected, smoker or non, vaccinated or not, having an «autistic kid» it’s a possibility and can happen to anyone. And we are not to be blamed for. We are human beings, we make mistakes and none of us is impeccable.

Hiding behind the superficial and our “ego” instead of our “soul” is destroying us.

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Everyone of us is just being silent about our feelings, as if we would be pathetic if we talk. But according to me our silence makes us pathetic. The silence of our society makes us pathetic. “Ignoring” problems or judging others like we are all saints. Like it won’t happen to us. But it will. One way or another we suffer in our human experience. Different problems, deceases, terrible love stories. And that’s ok because we will not recognise the sun if there is no shadow.

Just there is one thing we truly need to understand – our feelings are the most powerful thing we have. Only they have the true power to make us feel alive and ‘ignoring” or “killing” them is far more wrong than everything else. It traumatises us and life goes by while we are creating “strategies” instead of ” living” feelings.

I dare you to go out and pour out your honesty and relief your body and soul for one time and forever. Immediately, feel the pain and then release it – send it far away!

Because it will always be more sad being sorry for the things we didn’t do than the things we did and we feel sorry for.

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I think we all forget we have only one life.

And acceptance is the first step of recovering.

Feel.

Be present.

Relieve yourself.

No fear.

No regret.

Love, Paris

fptq

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